Xib's, Bibs, and Baby Cribs

Sitting in my chair in the living room, I keep looking at the clock, just anxiously waiting for the magic moment.  Quite honestly, I feel like a senior in high school staring at the wall clock just waiting for the bell to ring and summer to be here.  The difference is that the clock isn't counting down for for a fun relaxing vacation, but instead for my baby boy to be born.  Though there are potentially several days before his arrival, that doesn't help relieve the anxiety or decrease my excitement levels.

While these things are going through my head, the past, the present, and the future are increasingly in my thoughts.  Years ago, I would have never expected things to play out as they've played out, but that isn't a negative concept.  From the days of spending hours a day working with some amazing guys dealing with the next greatest method of keeping the network secure to now working with the best group of folks developing sites/products for clients all over the country, the adventure never ends.

To say that my life so far has been an amazing ride would be an understatement; though I might not live in San Francisco, have a ton of friends with start ups, or have stock options worth millions, this doesn't stop those from happening in the future.  Honestly this concept has been hard to grasp because so many people have already done so and this and most are younger.  The difference is that just because the timeline played out differently, the end result is still the same; success and happiness. ​

Where is all this going and why the reason for this post?  Many moons ago, I would write a blog that had significant traffic at it's peak.  I would network with follow bloggers, programmers, and people in general not just for financial gain, but for friendship, conversation, and guidance/mentoring.  Most importantly;  I would learn and push myself harder to be better, smarter, and more valuable (not in net worth, but as a member of the community).  

With my son on the way and hitting this point in my life where I feel like it's time to make a decision versus saying "what if," I want to get back to the old me.  The passion, the drive, the dreams, it's all about leaving a legacy, providing for my family, and enjoying life.  In order to do so, ​I want to do the things I've been making excuses for over the past months (in no set order):

  1. ​Learn Objective-C and start focusing on mobile development for a larger portion of my income
  2. Launch a start up (not a website, a product used by thousands) before the end of the year​
  3. Begin sharing code publicly in order to learn better practices, help with open source projects, and become a stronger developer (both in regards to mobile and web)​
  4. Share openly my goals and habits in order to be held "accountable" should I fail (just for the peer pressure)

None of these items take priority over my son, none of these take priority over my family, there simply isn't time to put them off any longer.  In order to meet my five year plan (30 years old), these concepts simply have to be done now in order to get the timeline in order.  

So for readers of this site, friends on Twitter & Facebook, this "blog" is going to become a place where I can simply share my opinions on the industry, on startups, as well as sharing code, projects, and just as an opportunity to meet some new folks.​


PS:  To my amazing wife, thank you for constantly listening to my nonsense ideas, being supportive of any business idea I throw your way, and most importantly, being my best friend and the mother of my baby boy.  You're a rockstar and I couldn't do anything without you! Lorazepam is a prescription medication that belongs to the family of benzodiazepines. Serotonin levels control how much blood is allowed to flow through the tiny vessels in the head. Rizatriptan. Maxalt can therefore control this blood flow by controlling how much serotonin is available. When a patient is diagnosed with this condition, he or she has been doing a lot of worrying while feeling very anxious for a considerable amount of time. learn more. Social anxiety is a general discomfort that results from being around or having to interact with other people. Klonopin. ​

Hello World, for the 25th time.

It's a little bit after ten o'clock at night, the skies are that beautiful pink color before snow arrives, the sounds are silent, and the world around you is simply taking solace inside of their homes snuggled under a blanket with loved ones and hot chocolate. I however sit staring blankly at the laptop and notebook currently sitting in my lap awaiting my thoughts, ideas, or even just a single line of code. I lacked a sense of direction, I lacked any goals, and I lacked any motivation; I simply knew I wanted something different; something more.

Within minutes though, the pink clouds were no longer a distant thought of snow, they were now providing a very soft snow fall on window and making the weather even the slightest bit colder. At this point, no longer could I sit in my current position, I needed to find a spot for the night, I needed a place to sleep. Driving down old Route 40 in Frederick, MD, I remember just watching the snow fall so softly, so gentle, and so calmly that I forgot the situation that I was currently living. No matter how calming the weather outside, I still knew that I didn't have the ability to watch with joy.

After finding a place to sleep inside of an old friends housing development, I parked the car, turned the heat on high, put the laptop in the trunk, plopped a pillow behind my head, and covered up with a blanket. This was my night, this was my life, and there was a fear that things would never change. There was no one to tell you goodnight, there was no one around to help, it was simply a bad situation.

You see, I was 18 years old and a series of events had unfolded in my life that caused the downturn of everything I thought was normal. No longer was I asleep in the comfort of a bed; no longer was I spending time with a family who loved me; life had failed me and I blamed everything around me. Fast forward 8 years, it's now my 25 birthday, and no matter the event I look to in the past, it all taught a lesson that would stick with me for the rest of my life.

That night, that exact moment when it was 20 degrees outside and I was trying to get comfortable for the night in my car, never did I imagine that things would get better. Now I get to wake up everyday next to my absolutely amazing wife, I get to be excited for my baby boy to arrive within the next couple months, and I get to spend time with a family and friends that support and motivate me constantly. Without having lived through those lessons in the past, the current would not be the reality, it would still be the dream.

I type this up as I often think back to the period of time where all of this was going on just to better appreciate my life. As an example, in the past several years, I've worked with some AMAZING folks and I've worked with some real pieces of work. I've had some fantastic friends who I've stabbed in the back (sorry TayTay), and I've had some friends stab me in the back. I've had ideas months/years before someone created a product, but never did I build a product to compete. None of these events compare. Once you hit rock bottom, no matter what you consider that point, it's the climb back up that is what makes you strong and makes you a better version of yourself.

So today, for my birthday, I don't want happy birthday wishes from anyone, I simply want people to go out, live, love, laugh, and smile. Life is amazing, don't forget that.

RIP Steve Jobs

We live in a fast paced world, a world full of innovation, creativity, and possibilities, but we live in a world where innovators are quite few and far between.  Steve Jobs truly lived; he lived his life pushing himself and those around him towards perfection.

As a young kid, I remember my parents purchasing our first computer and how amazing this technology seemed at the time. It was not an Apple, it was not the fastest machine on the block, but it was amazing and inspiring to me. From that point on, it was destiny, I was truly a geek and my hero's were not the typical guys you'd have posters on your wall of; instead they were Steve Jobs and Bill Gates. These men were leaders, they were the ones you knew even then that would change the world as we knew it.

Fast forward, it's 2012; I'm a fanboy, but more importantly, I'm a student. I've watched Steve Jobs build his company, I've watched him pursue not only his dreams, but the dreams of those around him. Look at the number of people making a living solely off of iPhone apps; where would you be now if that device was never invented? Where would you be without the ability to cry at the beginning of Up? Where would you be should the tides of time not have of allowed you into this industry?

More importantly than the past though is the future; raise a glass to Steve's family and his memories, shed a tear, but then go back to what you were doing; creating. BuildInnovateLoveInspire! It's up to all of us, not the millions of Apple fanboys, but to all individuals to keep the future moving, dreams bright, and possibilities flowing.

So to you Mr. Jobs, may you rest in peace, you've inspired millions, your friends and family are in all of our prayers, but I'm getting back to inspiring and creating...